I've just got back from my break in Sweden and I have a whole host of stories about viking hats, the frog dance, blonde girls, baltic islands, scamping on the high seas, vast consumption of goon wine and a Radiohead concert. No doubt you're all extremely curious about all of those, but rather than explain myself I'm going to go ahead and fill out one of those 'tagged' thingys instead (thanks to Léonie), you'll just have to come and listen to my stories in the pub one day. Also, if I write all the stories here, they'll remain the same forever. If you happen to see me out and about in a couple of months time, rubbish bits of the tales would have been forgotten and the better bits exaggerated, they'll be better stories as a result.
So, on with talking about myself...
1) WHAT WAS I DOING TEN YEARS AGO?
I was a sixteen year old in a small town in west Wales who had just finished his exams for the summer, we sat in our classes in school learning nothing other than how to kill time until the end of term in mid July. The teachers desperately tried to find us something to do but, they could only do so much before we started going home early, playing football all day in the sun or just not bothering to go into school at all. I often walked or hitched the seven miles back home at about 1pm, then I'd wind my parents up by complaining I was bored until it was time for them to go to bed. I had also just started my first job in the school swimming pool where I was given the title of 'Lifeguard'. I came nowhere near to guarding anyone's life as I just sat by the pool collecting entrance fees and chatting to anyone that came in for a swim whilst the swimming pool supervisor (and the only other member of staff) sneaked off to the pub.
2)WHAT ARE 5 THINGS ON LIST TO DO TODAY?
- Find things to do in work until it's time to go home
- Tell everyone (apart from the internets) about my hilarious trip to Sweden
- Send a card to my friends in Calgary containing $1.50 in coins, which I couldn't exchange when I got home from Canada, they'll find it more useful.
- I hadn't thought this far ahead, but masturbation will be a good substitute for anything productive I had planned.
- I should really arrange somewhere to stay in London for Saturday night after we've celebrated Canada Day (in the Maple Leaf, Convent Garden - join in!) but I'll probably just repeat number four again.
3) THINGS I WOULD DO IF I WAS A BILLIONAIRE
- The instant I found out I'd go and get drunk in the local pub, but still go for the £6 jug deals.
- Fill up my rucksack with a load of clothes and heaps of 100ml shower gels (bloody airport restrictions) and jet off around the world. Starting with a return to Sweden.
- Attempt to count to one billion.
- Keep it a secret.
4) FIVE PLACES I HAVE LIVED
At the last count, I'd lived in countless places - here are five of the many;
- Aberystwyth, Ceredigion
- Bordon, Hampshire
- The Hills, Carmarthenshire
- Calgary, Alberta
- Cardiff, South Glamorgan
5) THREE OF MY BAD HABITS
- I exaggerate, all the time. Just to entertain myself more than anything.
- I get far too drunk when I'm out, just to entertain myself.
- I constantly forget things. I forget to stop exaggerating and I forget to avoid getting drunk. This entertains others.
- Resource Manager
- Roundabout Designer
I really can't remember, there wasn't much of a thought process as I didn't think that anyone would actually read it. The fact that people still do surprises me.
8) NEED TO TAG 5 or 6 PEOPLE
I'm not sure I could do this - it'd reek of favouritism, and I love you all the same amount.