Wednesday, March 28, 2007


Life is strange at the moment. Strange but good.

We dubbed last summer "The Summer of Unluck" after so many plans and things we'd hoped for fell through. This year has already chucked up a whole bunch of (good) surprises.

I'm usually in a good mood, with the expectation that something amazing is about to happen - this causes much bouncing around, thinking I'm great and laughing at my own jokes. At the moment though, I'm chilled out, thoughtful, reflective and not letting things get to me - however good or bad.

Current mood: Nothing. Is that possible?

Years of my life have been spent maintaining that life is very simple. Over the last fortnight, I've realised that it is, in fact, really fucking complicated. Who would've thought?

Current mood: Bracing myself for something that's going to hit, without knowing what it is.

Monday, March 26, 2007

Lovely Spam

Was I the only person in the world dull enough to put my real e-mail address on the bl*g so tiny little scanning bots could read it and spam the hell out of me? No?

I've heard of bits of code you can put into the template to 'suck' the scanners into a fake site, but that might have just been a dream. The same dream in which that blonde girl was sucking things just before I woke up.

Speaking of dreams, I had an AWESOME one the other day...

I was standing outside a row of shops, feeling a bit down after getting dumped by someone (I have no idea who). My house-mate was there, trying to cheer me up. She re-assured me that I'd find another girl as my muscles were very nice. Instantly I felt better and who was the first person I saw walking towards us on the street? A blonde Swedish girl named Eva, she may have been German though. I knew her name before talking to her, and we instantly started making out when she reached us. Brilliant.

All of a sudden I noticed the weather had changed, the sky was darker and I had a feeling that something horrible was going to happen. I turned around to see some pretty evil-looking teletubbies walking towards us.. "Run!" I shouted, Eva ran around them and jumped into an over-flowing river next to a scrap yard. I ran shortly afterwards - not bothering to go around the teletubbies, I flew into the purple one and knocked it flat on its arse. I then jumped into the river which was extremely fast flowing. Before I knew it, I'd lost Eva and I was starting to drown. Luckily I was hauled to the side by Mani from Primal Scream and several members of Oasis (the original line-up). Mani and his rock pals had been living in the scrap yard and fighting off teletubbies for a long time, and were livid when I told them what had just happened.

We all jumped back into the river, which of course was now flowing in the other direction, and climbed back onto the street. Mani and his Mancunian pals, armed with crude weapons such as car stereo aerials and gear levers, ran towards the teletubbies at full pelt - I was going to run as well but at the last second I noticed Eva struggling in the water. I turned around and lept over the fence into the water again, this time though, I failed to spot a concrete block at the bottom of the river. My head hit it with full force, and that's what woke me up.... I'd whacked my head against the bed post.

Weird, huh?

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Please Wait... Loading...

I'll be back soon, just recovering from an amazing weekend.

This helped, immensely. I held on until the final whistle, celebrated by nodding my head and smiling at everyone while they jumped around. Then I mysteriously disappeared, only to be found by my house-mates a couple of hours later - passed out on the couch.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

March so far

Bad things to happen this month: -
  • Silk Pants overheating.
  • Wales playing crap rugby.
  • Holes appearing in my shoes while it's raining.
  • My hair mis-behaving more than ever.
  • I've been low on energy and have been feeling a little uninspired.
  • I stuck a metal knife in the toaster at work to rescue a burning hot-cross bun, I shorted the entire office building. I rescued the bun though, and I sat there eating it in front of everyone at work while they sat contemplating all the work they'd lost. We laughed a lot, mainly because I was glad I didn't electrocute myself.

Good things to happen this month:-
  • Getting up really early on a Saturday to drive up to the Brecon Beacons. I dragged two girls to the highest point in South Wales, they complained most of the way up but were very impressed with the view once we got to the top, despite the fact that we were in the clouds and it was bloody windy.
  • We saw the Kaiser Chiefs in the students union. They were alright, I didn't enjoy it as much as I could have as Wales had just lost to Italy and I was knackered after walking up in the mountains.
  • We also saw Bedouin Soundclash for a second time. Last time we saw them, we took them out on the piss around Cardiff and wound up in a steak house discussing reggae, sambucca on cornflakes and steak - it didn't happen again. They sounded great, the gig was cracking and we danced our little socks off.

Good things ABOUT to happen this month:-
  • Wales v England in Cardiff on Saturday. We've lost all four games so far in this years Six Nations competition. Wales v England is always good fun but very intense, it's the game which has more than points at stake. National pride and bragging rights are on the line.
  • St.Patricks. It's been close recently, but this year Paddy's has fallen on the same day as the final round of Six Nations matches. Those combined, plus the fact that it's the Wales-England match, means that it's probably going to be the biggest drinking day this year. The words 'Memory Loss' just won't do it justice.
  • The Howling Bells are coming to Cardiff. I was blown away with their CD and amazed by their live performance, now I'm going to see them again. I'm well stoked to be going.
  • Friends. The game on Saturday brings many friends together. Staying in my house will be Lord Sudrick, The King and Random Andy. Three of my greatest friends, three blokes that don't know the meaning of a bad time. We all live in different places and it'll be the first time we've all been together for a while. There will be an army of us in the pub by the time the match comes around. I'm excited a teeny weeny lot.

Monday, March 05, 2007

An adventure with pants

My weekend has been spent being late for launch parties by drinking too much gin, dancing in the students union, vegging in friends houses, not going home and going to the pub.

A weekend full of activities then, but Monday morning brought with it a bit of a shock - I hadn't done a single bit of laundry on the weekend, more specifically I hadn't washed any pants (British use of the word, Yanks and Aussies) or socks. This left me with a number of decisions to make:-

a) Re-use the pants I was wearing the day before
b) Go commando
c) Not go to work at all, and do my laundry instead
d) Wear the only items of underwear left, some red, flowery, novelty silk boxers from Thailand.

I'm not a fan of re-using underwear unless it's really necessary, so A was ruled out pretty quickly. B has been done many times before but it's not ideal when you like wearing old, comfortable jeans with holes in them, as I do. I might avoid work if there was a real emergency, like snow days, but C definitely wouldn't stand up as an argument for taking a day off. I was left with one decision, the novelty boxers.

The nice, smooth feel of the material was initially pleasing, I even made a sort of 'swishing' sound when I walked. But, Pulling on my jeans and walking to work reminded me why I never wore the bloody things, the heat was unbearable and I knew that at some point during the day, sweating would occur. Every movement (along with over-heating the boys) was making the elastic waistband ride further and further up my torso, it finally settled half-way up my stomach which meant that I was flashing the bright red monstrosities (the boxers...) every time I stood up/sat down/put a coat on/took my coat off.

The novelty boxers were only a temporary measure however, I ran out to buy some more underwear once I was in town. I'm not too familiar with shopping for underwear, Christmas presents usually cover the bulk of my collection. I was disappointed to find that Marks & Spencer's had a HUGE lingerie section but men's underwear was restricted to two shades of grey boxers in one small corner of the room. I tried a couple of other shops and grabbed anything that looked like it'd fit me, I haven't checked my purchases yet - I'm REALLY hoping that none of them are made of silk.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

Dydd Dewi Sant hapus

It’s the 1st of March again, the daffodils are in full bloom, plenty of people have leeks pinned to their clothes, at dusk the Empire State building will be lit up in the colours of the Welsh flag, many school kids in Wales are dressed up in traditional costume, the ale will be flowing, and of course, later on we'll all be sitting round a nice coal fire, drinking daffodil juice and calling each other ‘boyo’ more than we usually do.

Happy St.Davids Day.