Tuesday, January 30, 2007

3rd post attempt.

Wednesday saw my will give way,
From our local I just couldn't stay,
A lock in kept me up until two,
That's past bedtime for me AND for you.

Thursday I felt a little rough,
But energy I had just enough,
To make it through I had to be thrifty,
We saw our friend's new band, Space in the 50's.

Friday of course was the end of the week
But that didn't stop my drinking streak,
It started at 4pm in a pub with Cope,
I finished eight hours later, feeling almost doped.

Saturday morning I was up at eight,
To earn some cash and work for a mate,
Completely shattered I crashed in at five,
When I received a call from an old friend - "We're in Cardiff, are you still alive"?

Sunday I cursed my Irish friends,
They'd got me horribly drunk again,
My weekend was ending and I felt rather strange,
What sorted it? A ten hour session in the Coal Exchange.

Monday morning I could hardly breathe,
My limbs were aching and I needed a reprieve,
I saw my reflection and started to titter,
Big dark eyes and a head covered in glitter.

It's Tuesday now and I'm still having trouble breathing,
Almost every single laugh is followed by wheezing,
But if you thought I had fulfilled my social aspirations,
Saturday brings the start of the Six Nations.

Hoo-fucking-ray.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Just another number

Friday, January 19, 2007

Oh boobs.

There I was, whingeing to just about everyone in sight about the fact that I didn't have the new bl*gger yet... then it comes along and screws everything up. A whole bunch of people have gone anonymous and I wouldn't be surprised in the slightest if no-one can comment here at all.

Now I might just have to use my brain sort out a new template.

Anyone got ideas for a theme?

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Roadside Retribution

It had been raining heavily only moments before; I noticed the brief respite and quickly bolted out of the house to get into the town centre before the deluge started again. On my way I had managed to get stuck behind a lovely teenage couple who were having a full-blown argument as they walked along the street. Eff this, eff that… you effing whore” etc. poured out in a constant stream from both parties – it wasn’t the most pleasant thing to listen to. They were walking about the same speed as I was and as a result I was unable to overtake.

By the time we had reached the pedestrian crossing on a large road, another couple had caught up with us and in similar fashion, attempted to overtake, but couldn’t. We were prevented from crossing the road as the lights were turning green and the cars were about to move. The obscenities continued, “You effing did”, “I effing never!”, while the three of us waited impatiently. I caught the eye of the girl standing next to me, she rolled her eyes and shook her head, she was just as irritated as I was – I chuckled.

The cars had just started moving, I noticed a large pot-hole in the road which was full of water and immediately shifted a couple of metres backwards. I attracted the attention of the girl again, her boyfriend also noticed me - I pointed to the pot-hole and indicated that they should move. They both jumped backwards too, wry smiles creeping across their faces.

All of the cars somehow managed to avoid the hole and the lights were about to change back to red, my disappointment was clearly visible. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, the no.27 Bus to Thornhill came roaring along – he was obviously running late and didn’t have time to be stopped by insignificant things such as traffic lights. I stepped back another couple of metres, I knew this was going to be a big one…

The lights changed red just as the no.27 raced over the pot-hole… SPLOOSH! One of my favourite noises in the world was accompanied by silence as the arguing couple were splashed with a surprisingly large volume of muddy water. I burst out laughing and the couple standing next to me joined in, we crossed the road and went our separate ways, sniggering as we went.

It’s the little things that make my day.

Friday, January 05, 2007

Question Time

  • Why do people bring cakes/biscuits to their place of employment when it's THEIR birthday? I've always been disturbed by this. The closest I've got to finding an answer is the King Cake story.
  • Why have I twice thought I've seen a giant mouse shopping in Cardiff which, when mentioned, causes much mocking in my direction?
  • Why hasn't it snowed here yet?
  • How soon will it be before Cope starts learning Hindko?

Answer me or I'll make you sit and watch an entire organ compositon in Halberstadt, the next change of tone will be on July 5th in 2008.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Big Trouble in Little Wales

With another Christmas and New Year dealt with, we can finally crack on with things being normal again. Normal, as in pretty much all over the place - I've done almost nothing but sleep since December 23rd.

It wasn't particularly miserable, but it hasn't been the most exciting time of year either. The only notable activity of recent days* was quite possibly the most unfortunate New Years I've ever had. Unfortunately (see what I mean?) details will have to be left out, which hurts me as much as it hurts you (because it's actually a pretty funny story) but it's to avoid hurting anyone else - got it? Good. The last few New Years' have been spent in Pembrokeshire so I thought I'd try something different, a house party in London seemed like a good choice. I had managed to grab a lift down there with an old mate who's currently romancing a Welsh girl. Things were great, we had a fun trip down and then had a great time in the pub catching up, drinking and then talking shit. Things started going wrong on New Years Eve...

  • We booked a taxi home for 2am - I was disgusted to hear that it would cost us £50 for the pleasure. I'm not a fan of taxi's at the best of times, so this was extremely bad news.
  • A whole load of us went to a PUB at 22:30, which was I thought was the wrong kind of thing to be doing at a HOUSE party.
  • At 11pm, I ran out to meet pals Sud and Shona from the train station - the club refused to let us back in (something to do with licencing and a weasely pub manager intent on being a jobsworth). By the time the Chimes rolled around, the three of us were on our own in a Whetherspoons, downing shots to get as drunk as possible.

Almost straight after getting back to the house...

*Censored stuff*

... and Sud had to make the trek back through central London with no shoes.

All that over and done with, I had a great time waiting for trains back home in the morning. The sunshine was brilliant in Guildford, it was so warm just sitting (sleeping, dribbling) for half an hour while I waited for a train to come along. At Reading, I waited for another half hour but had a great chat with a girl that had seen me pass out on a bench in Guildford. I have a great skill for making random train friends (RTF's).

Hanging around old mates has brought out my sarcastic sense of humour again, I've missed it deeply. It'll probably fade away again sometime soon.

So, 2007 is going great (I'm not being sarcastic, I'm serious now).

I have a hankering to move to Sweden though, it's a pretty strong hankering and it's preventing me from thnking straight.

Last year I did a little best of 2005 thing, here's 2006 for ya:-

Highlight of 2006 :- I really don't think there has been a particular highlight, perhaps just meeting a whole load of new people.
Greatest personal achievement :- Erm, probably visiting another country - Latvia this time. Great place.
Biggest Regret :- Not saving any money.
Favourite band :- As with last year, it's a toss-up. Giant Drag have been amazing. There's also an honourable mention for Neko Case, beautiful stuff. But the Howling Bells edged it by playing live in front of me and sounding amazing.
Best night out :- Canada Day, by far. An immense day out, so many drunk people and not one bit of aggro!
Favourite Read :- I haven't read a single book, and have rarely touched a newspaper. what an internet snob I've become. I did quite like reading out the ingredients of a cigarette packet to one of my smoking friends recently, try it - it's fun.



*Apart from a night with my Brother, a lad named Donkey, his girlfriend and two (hot) lesbians playing Bullseye. This is Bullseye you dirty feckers.