Friday, January 13, 2006

Help the Aged

I've just been out on a mission to buy some tea-bags for the boys in the office.

As I walked up to the entrance of the store, I saw a little old lady struggling with the door. I opened the door for her with my best 'I'm a lovely young man' smile and then carried on with my search for tea.

Only ten paces inside the store there was another little old lady finding it difficult to reach the Shredded Wheat from the top shelf. As I was at least ten times the height of the old lady, I stretched up into the sky and plucked the box down for her, "Thank you, young man" she said. Before I could walk away, I heard a little voice from behind "Excuse me young man, could you please pass me some Shredded Wheat as well?" ANOTHER little old lady had crept up behind me! The two little old ladies then had a little old lady conversation about how I was a "Lovely young man", friends for life I'm sure.


Helpless

I then noticed that the ENTIRE store was full of little old ladies and a couple even had reluctant shoppers in their husbands (I assume...) walking along behind them.

I dashed to the end of the aisle and into the safety of the next - phew! There were no tea-bags in this aisle though so I had to risk going to another. The next aisle was the frozen food section and guess what? There was a little old lady having trouble opening the freezer door AND reaching inside for a frozen pizza... I tried avoiding eye contact but it was too late "Excuse me...." After fetching the pizza for her, I was treated to a story about how her grandson looked remarkably like me and how he loved Pizza (it turns out he was only 14 though... I'd hate to think that any 14 year olds look like me).

After getting rid of that one (Not as in bunging her into the freezer and hiding her amongst the peas and sweetcorn - I just finished the 'conversation'), I dashed to the tea-bags and ran for my life to the checkout. I was a little nervous as the old ladies in the queue were slowly unloading their baskets, luckily nothing was too heavy or too far out of their reach.

I finally made it back out again (After holding the door open for another old lady on the way), ran to the office and locked the door behind me and placed the key in a really HIGH location, ensuring it was out of reach of any old ladies.

10 Comments:

At 1:23 pm, Blogger Huw thought it was best to say...

Finally.

A post which ties in with your blog tagline thing up the top.

I've been waiting 7 months for this.

 
At 2:45 pm, Blogger Curly thought it was best to say...

I hadn't noticed that...

Er, I mean - Yer of course, cos I'm well clever and I'm like funny and that.

But, I'm still a long way away from meeting Nelly. I've been to the school she attended and I missed her by two or three blocks when she played the Calgary Stampede 2004. My David Seaman impersonation is flawless and I did help bring down Mr.Hussein. A little.

 
At 4:05 pm, Blogger Aarti thought it was best to say...

Awww you're so cute! Its like, you never have to help old ladies again, you've done your bit for them for now!!!

I'm gonna have to tell my friends about this guy I know (or dont!) and how he takes lil old women shopping! Its so sweet.

Unlike me. Ive had to shout at kids in classes Im not even teaching n just observing, for backchat or chitchat etc - cant wait to be let loose on them next week!!

 
At 4:51 pm, Blogger Neal thought it was best to say...

I used to work in a store and I helped little old ladies all of the time. They never tip, but are sweet anyway.

 
At 6:38 pm, Blogger Me Over Here thought it was best to say...

Helpful little whippersnapper, aren't you?

I'm not a little old lady or anything, but sometimes *I* need help reaching things off the top shelf. Damn my short stature!

 
At 10:34 pm, Blogger Afe thought it was best to say...

Dammit, those old ladies should have been helping YOU find the tea. You're very busy and important, and after all, they'll be dead soon anyway. As if they have anything important to do.

 
At 10:36 pm, Blogger mona thought it was best to say...

Curly, I can't reach anything in stores. I always have to ask for help- I wonder what I'll be like when I'm an old little lady.

 
At 5:38 am, Blogger Teri thought it was best to say...

Never go to the store when only the retired people aren't working...

 
At 5:46 pm, Blogger Cleavers thought it was best to say...

U sure they weren't trying to pick you up? It's something I've been known to do in supermarkets, using the fact that I'm vertically challenged to my advantage....

A-hem.

 
At 6:08 pm, Blogger Chris Cope thought it was best to say...

Nice to know that the shops are so woefully understaffed that customers must rely on one another to be able to give the shop their money. Capitalism thanks you for doing your part, Curly.

 

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