Wednesday, January 26, 2005

Happy Australia Day!

You what? Yep, it is indeed Australia Day today, just a great day to celebrate all things Australian! Last year I spent the day in the company of the entire Aussie populations crammed in Walkabout - how Australian can you get? And before Big Kev could tell me how excited he was (Pic below), I was hammered and telling everyone that I knew where Australia was, or something along those lines anyway. This year however, I just went to work and didn't even mention the event for fear of people asking me what it was about (which I don't really know the answer to). I just sang what I knew of the Aus anthem quietly to myself and went about my day.


Aussie legend Big Kev, on the right - "I'm Excited!" Think his company has gone bust...

So, what happened on the weekend then? I hear you all ask..... To be honest I don't remember! I picked up Bleddyn and Greggers from Carmarthen in the morning as they'd caught the train from Haverfordwest. I had hoped to get into Cardiff relatively early so to avoid 'Tsunami' traffic. It turns out that town was infact quieter than normal everywhere.... nevermind, just meant that we got to the pub quicker! Greggers, Bledd and myself got to the George at about 2:30pm and sat down for our first jug of beer. Soon afterwards, we were joined by Glasgow Dave (from Glasgow funnily enough) and Scouse and Cat (bar staff). All had a very merry time chatting away and drinking as usual, but soon got bored of that and started a few drinking games. We obviously appeared to be having a lot of fun as the lads on the table next door decided to join in and soon enough we had a full table of piss-heads getting into a worse state. The details get a bit hazy from that point, Scouse and Cat had left but had been replaced by Swansea Andy (from Swansea) and James (barman) - not as pretty but they added more to the proceedings!

Next thing I remember, I was standing in the Students Union thinking "How the fuck did I get in here - and where is everyone else?" (Just like that film, Momento, where he can't make new memories and has to write everything down before he forgets it.... Andy soon appeared closely followed by Dave, panic over and so was the memory recovery. Next flashback was of me dancing with Cat for ages - glad I remembered that bit!! Okay, fast forward another 2hrs and I was outside the boys flat, locked out with Andy in the cold and wet! Great, rang Steve from the pub at 2:30am (poor guy was asleep in bed with his girlfriend) the conversation went something like

Chris "Steve, I'm drunk, got locked out of the flat - where are you?"
Steve : " Round my girlfriends' house"
C : "Louise?"
S : "Yes. Louise, what do you want"
C : "Need somewhere to stay - ooh, can I stay in Louises porch"
S : "No"
C : "Oh, your house then?"
S : "Yeah, no problem mate - the front doors open.."
C : "Thanks mate, that's really cool, I owe you one for this, I'm locked out you see..."
S : "...Yeah, I know - see you later"
C : "Cheers, Thanks Thanks, I'm locked out and now I can stay somewhere..."
S : "Bye..." *click*

5 Minutes later, Steve got another call...

"Steve, Where's your house?" - he wasn't impressed as he then had to give directions to a drunk Chris who didn't know where he was at all even though he's walked the street hundreds of times before. "Left! Left - no, Left - Green door" then more "Thanks mate" from me... poor bastard!

Good times anyway - the next day I woke up on a couch in Steve, James' and Charlies house with Andy on the other couch. I spent the entire day Sunday trying to remember what had happened to Dave, James, Greggers, Bledd and the rest! What a nightmare - Andy went off to the staion and txted me later - "Red aftershock through straws..What were we thinking?!" , I don't know is the answer. Found out that no-ones actually remembers a thing - Greggers didn't get into the union as he was too fucked, Bledd had to look after him. All in all a good night anyway.

It's Bleddyns birthday in St.Davids on Saturday, I'll try and find a camera for that one, more memory loss no-doubt. Kids these days eh?

Thursday, January 20, 2005

Better ways to self destruct.

I wish that I had a microphone, then I'd be able to record the noise that I just made before typing anything today.... It was kind of a sigh/playing a didgeridoo/dribbling noise - it just made me laugh out loud afterwards! Not sure what my family in the next room are thinking! "Chris is at that Croatian Midget Porn again.."

Another week of not much excitement has almost passed. Just been pissing around in the workshop again - one of the lads has chicken pox and has been told to stay at home for 10 days while both of our bosses have been pushing paper all week so we've had a HUGE workshop between only 3 of us. Quite nice really, we've not been busy so the radio has been turned up (although it did get turned down when I heard Maroon 5 again, for the 5th time in a day) and we've generally done fuck all. Nice.

Last Saturday was interesting, I didn't do much during the day as there isn't much to do at home at any time. I rang Andy (from Llanelli) to see if he was up for doing anything - he was, and he drove up to LLandeilo to have a couple of pints with me. He'd never been before (most people just drive through to be honest, shame as it's a nice place) so I took it upon myself to show him around the pubs. Town was dead (even for a Saturday night) which was great as we got nice seats in all the pubs and always got served straight away! In the Castle Hotel we sat next to the roaring fire and drank a very nice pint of Llandeilo brewed Evan Evans Cwrw Haf, fucking gorgeous it was. It's so rare in a city that you are able to buy a good, proper ale in a decent pub - the people of Llandeilo (pop. around 3000) are extremely lucky to have so many pubs (Seven) in town that serve a nice, local beer! Skipped on to the Angel, and to the Salutation - Andy had to get back for work on Sunday so we couldn't go on the piss unfortunately, probably a good thing though! I had a great evening on just two pints and was back home by 11! That's unheard of for me! If anyone else needs showing around Llandeilo I'll be more than happy to help - I love showing it off! (On that note, don't listen to any comments from people in Ammanford or Llandovery about the 'ruffness' of Llandeilo - it's not bad at all). What is it with that though? People in Llandovery say that Llandeilo is rough, and vice versa - People in Swansea think Cardiff is rough, vice versa. If you listen to everyone, you wouldn't go anywhere at all!

It was my birthday yesterday - one of those days that I never look forward to and am always glad when it's over! I am now 23 years old, still doing okay on the age front! I can't stand the attention that you get on your birthday - everyone tries to be extra nice and it's just way too fake for me. Why should I get a present from my parents and card from everyone else just because of my parents drunken night of poking 23yrs 9months ago? The only thing that I like about having a birthday is that it's one of the best excuses to go out and get drunk with your mates - people make more of an effort to come out, which is nice because I love spending time talking to everyone in the pub! That night out will be on Saturday - I'm not one of those people that stresses on my birthday - "Oh no, what if so and so doesn't come, does that mean that they don't like me?" "What if no-ones comes.... what'll I do?" - I've met these people and they scare the shit out of me to be honest! I'm very lucky to have a set of hardcore socialisers as mates, they appear in the pub at the drop of a hat - some will be there long before you even thought that you needed a hat in the first place! I'll be in the G on Sat with the following....


The infamous Andrew Gregory...


Bleddyn (left) and Eirian (the other one) - Possibly Drunk, who knows?

Jonny Focus - I think he's trying to hit the white?

And possibly an old mate in the form of Donkey Jones, from Woking of all places..

Rich and Donkey Boy - we know you're not Gay! Wink Wink!

And my little Bro, perhaps, only if Uni work isn't being done!

My Brother, posing...

Should be a good laugh - who knows who'll turn up? Could be a good'un! Anyone that's reading this is more than welcome to come along, no stalking me though okay?

Saturday, January 15, 2005


They've had to pull this advert for some reason...?

Dug This up from somewhere.... Ugly bastards!


Me and Owain Wales V Ireland 2004

Friday, January 14, 2005

What a difference a week makes!

This time last week I had just collapsed in a heap on the sofa after some hardcore socialising and was feeling a bit crap to be honest. Tonight, I've just collapsed in a heap on the sofa and am feeling a bit crap, no socialising this time though...

Monday I started back at work in the workshop (I know, I probably had a longer xmas holiday than you did - that's life! The Welding industry seems to stop completely over xmas as all our suppliers, delivery trucks etc stop too, not that I mind), it involved getting up in the dark and cold again, not good for the old nipples (the cold that is, not the dark... Imagine that though, nipples that were afraid of the dark - Think Abi Titmuss has a pair of those...). Work was the usual, moving metal around, cutting it up and welding it back together again, keeps the old fitness ticking over! Tuesday and Wednesday we went down to RAF St.Athan near Barry to put a metal roof on a storage shed, spent the entire two days in the half-dark, the cold and the wet, tightening bolts! Think Thomas Cook offer the same deal on their website - "Two Days in Barry, you give us £60 and we'll send you onto an air-force base to be miserable! *transport and hotels not included). To be fair though, the weather on Wednesday was lush -if not a bit windy- and would have been a great day to go hiking on the Black Mountains!

Thursday however was a different kettle of fish. Today I had an interview for a new job in Swansea with an Engineering consultancy. It's based in a small room in the top of an office block on Princess Way (near Yates' for the piss-heads). To cut a long story short, I got the job anyway - I've got a rough idea of what's involved, it all looks pretty interesting. Seems to be assessing impacts of new buildings (houses to stadiums) on the infrastructure of places like Cardiff or Swansea, pretty cool. This may mean a move down that way, hope so - it'll be cool going to live somewhere different, even if it is only Swansea!

Friday, back in the workshop today but we all had it pretty easy - everyone had a good laugh at Mark Thatcher "Unwittingly" funding a coup on a Central African country !! He thought he was funding an Air-ambulance, not a Helicopter Gunship!!

No plans for the weekend, I'm getting a teeny weeny bit excited about the Rugby (England v Wales) on the 5th of Feb. I lost sleep in the run-up to the Autumn internationals and this promises to cause more sleepless nights in a couple of weeks. Just seen the Scarlets result for tonight, they've just lost 53-36 to Toulouse. Oh shit. France for the 6N again? Probably.

Sunday, January 09, 2005

A Trip to Old Trafford - Not what I'd planned for today.

Didn't even get up until midday today, slept on the Sofa in the boys flat in Cardiff, Greggers woke me up and said that we had to go as Paul was coming to pick us up to go to Manchester. Just about managed to get myself up, was still feeling a bit sick after the Swansea exploits two nights ago but that was fixed by a swift Guinness in the George. James was working behind the bar and was more than happy to ply us with alcohol at such an early time! Paul picked us up at sometime in the afternoon and we started on our way up to Manc. Reason why we are going - Paul Martin (Greggers mate from St.Davids) had won two tickets to go and see Manchester United play Spurs at old Trafford with a nights accommodation thrown in, he had decided to take Greggers along with him and I just went for the ride really. We arrived in Manc sometime around 6:30pm, we dumped all our stuff in the hotel room and had to hot-foot it down to Old Trafford to pick up the tickets for the boys at 7:30pm. Greggers mate Howells met us at the stadium so we both went off to find a pub while the other two watched the game. The pub we found was called 'The Trafford'. The game wasn't particularly interesting (is football ever? - don't answer that one) apart from an incident where a Spurs shot was fumbled by Carroll, the Man U keeper, and went over the line by about 3 yrds before he managed to slap it back out - the goal was dis-allowed, controversial...! But I don't give a shit!

By the time that we found Greggers and paul again, it was 11pm and all hope of going into Manchester drinking had been dashed. The only places open were Gay Bars or Hard Rock nights, we managed to find a bar that was open for ten minutes so we had a quick pint, then a kebab and then back to the hotel! Owain, sorry I didn't get in touch with you - I had to stick to the boys schedule and didn't want to fuck you about telling you we were here then there etc. Up at midday the next day, the boys had a tour round the footy grounds so I went off to have a look at the Imperial War Museum, it's the first museum that I'd been to for a while and I found it very interesting! I did get quite scared at one point though where I had obviously not taken note of any announcements made over the loudspeakers when suddenly all the lights cut out and I realised that I was on my own, in the dark! I turns out that there was a film going on just around the corner and they'd turned the lights out to show it, everyone else was sitting down watching it while I was creeping around trying to not make my presence known in case I embarrassed myself even more! I eventually found a room with lights on so I stayed there until the lights came back on about 10 minutes later and casually walked back out in to the main area as though nothing had happened!!

We drove home as soon as the boys had finished their tour and Paul dropped me and Greggers off in Cardiff on the way back to St.Davids. We walked straight to the George for a few pints, Scouse was working along with a couple of other girls that I didn't know the name of (One was later introduced to me as Carly - I think, nice girl anyway). We knew that this was going to transform from a quiet drink into a piss-up as soon as Greggers decided to buy a couple of aftershocks, ooh. Dropped out stuff off back at the flat (pretty half-cut by this point) and charged into town. We Agreed that the only decent place on a Wednesday would be Lloyds bar so we headed inside and just got leathered again. Bumped into a few people we know then crashed back at the house.

Next day we just chilled around the flat, Bowen has just bought a new sound system so we just watched films and played on the x-box all night. The only time I went outside was to pick up food and beer. So, a night in with the boys - something I haven't done since my Ninian Road days back last June! Was good fun. Watched films until 5am I think it was before finally passing out.

Jon woke me up at 12:30pm by thrusting an x-box controller in to my hand and instructing me on how to use it! Funny. Played more x-box until we'd completed halo 2 then I caught the train back to Swansea and the bus back to Ammanford. My brother picked me up and drove me home, food then crashed out again - finally back in my own bed since New Years eve!

Today, I slept until about 3pm. My Parents have taken my brother back down to Southampton to start Uni again on Monday and they're staying over night. I'm left to look after my little Sister (who's 12) while they're away. We've had a night in eating pizza, drinking beer and watching movies - who else is going to teach her how to do it otherwise?!!

Right, off to bed then. It's 4:46am and I'm fucking shattered. Sunday tomorrow, I know that I'll sleep for most of it then it's back into the routine of getting up at 7am and working all day in a job that I don't really enjoy. Can't wait, Fucking A.

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

And still it continues....

Swansea is a place that I haven't been out in in over 2 years so I was looking forward to going back to the place where I was going out when I was 16-17-18 years old!

I drove to Andys' place in LLangennech near LLanelli at about 6pm, got changed into shirt and shoes (because you have to in Swansea) and his parents drove us into town. Swansea is a great place, Dylan Thomas famously described it as a 'Ugly, Lovely City' and it's exactly that! There's nothing particulary appealing about it visually but there's just an atmosphere about the place that I just love - I prefer visiting Swansea over Cardiff just for that atmosphere (with the emphasis on visiting). The two main drinking streets are Wind Street (where most of the pubs are) and The Kingsway (Mainly Clubs). We started at the bottom of Winds Street, hitting 'Yates' first for some food with our drink, then to the Walkabout, The Toad, The Square (where I found a load of guys from LLandeilo that I hadn't seen in ages - funny that), The pitcher and piano and some other bar that I forget the name of - think it was new. We then headed down to the Kingsway to get into a club as time was getting on, we then discovered that several of the big clubs were closed so everyone was trying to cram into the rest - they soon filled up and had closed their doors before we got anywhere near! I had remembered seeing that Yates' was open until 1am so we went back there to gorge ourselves on more beer.

Almost got myslef into trouble (again) when I saw someones wallet on the bar - now usually if that was one of my mates wallets I would steal the wallet and watch them panic while they run around trying to find it - and thought to myslef "Let's steal that wallet", in my state it turned out that I'd actually said it out loud and the big guy that owned the wallet turned round to kill me... No idea what I said to get out of it but after talking to him we seemed to be having a laugh about it, right until I asked him "Who's the girl with the nice tits" and he replied "My girlfriend" "Time to go" I said to Andy as I legged it out the front door!

Found ourselves a curry house and gorged ourselved until we felt sick! Brilliant! Then went to the taxi rank, this particular taxi office always provided me with a laugh in the past and this night it was living up to its usual standards! A Jack (Jack = Someone from Swansea for the uninitiated) couple were sitting inside tucking into a curry, which they explained to us that they had stolen from a takeaway from down the road but the way that they explained it was just hilarious! I can't put it into words but it was just like listening to Helen from Big Brother talking! I was hysterics when the girl said to us in her thick Swansea accent "We're going out next Saturday - wanna come Curry robbin' with us?" That ended the night nicely!

Today, we both went for a walk along the Bury Estuary to clear our heads - it was a nice rainy, cold and windy day so perfect for hangovers! Walked for about half an hour then I drove Andy home, then drove home myself - I was about to throw up after the curry last night so though it best if I got home to recover! Got home fine and collapsed on my bed for a nice sleep, well it was nice until I received a phonecall from Greggers, "Want to come to Cardiff tonight and Manchester tomorrow night?" How can one refuse?

Caught the train to Cardiff from Carmarthen with Greggers and Bledd, got in at midnight so am off straight to bed in a minute, still aching from the last three nights of drinking!

Sunday, January 02, 2005

The New Year then...

Alongside Christmas, I think that NYE is usually one of the most over-rated events of the year. Pubs charge £10 to get in, clubs charge even more, and people get all excited at midnight - forgive me for thinking it but aren't these the same people that complain they're getting older each year on their birthdays? I know I'm being pretty negative about the whole 'start the new year off on the right foot' thing but hey, I like whinging! I'm just fed up with the whole commercialisation of all these 'special' days throughout the year. The days that I really don't look forward to in the year are New Years Eve, My Birthday, Valentines, and Christmas Day. Easter, Halloween, Mothers Day, Guy Fawkes are all fine because I just don't get involved so they don't affect me!

So, how did this New Years celebrations compare to the previous 21? Just as bad, but with more company! I traveled down to St.Davids again to see the usual lads, Greggers and Bleddyn etc, by the time I'd got down there (One and a half hours drive) They'd all got down to Haverfordwest (another 15 miles back the way I'd come) - which didn't exactly kick the night off with a bang if you know what I mean. So, drove back to H'West and eventually found them in the Castle Hotel - absolutely Steaming! Greggers and Bledd were in the company of about 4 other boys from St.Davids and they'd all been on the pop since 11am, It was 5pm by this time! Bledd was falling asleep on the table, Greggers had just had a fight with the toilet roll dispenser after going for a shit, managing to rip it off the wall. We knew this because a nice lad named Bubba had filmed the enitire thing over the top of the cubicle on his camera phone! (I later heard that Bubbas phone was wrecked while he was washing it after Greggers had wiped his dick on it...)

Greggers and Bledd stayed in town with me while the boys headed off somewhere else. Greggers, the gentleman he is, bought me a catch up drink as he felt sorry for me being sober. He felt so sorry for me infact, he bought me a glass with 6 straight gins in it for me to get rid of sharpish! I obliged of course! Off we went to a bar called Lauras, nailed a few drinks then left as it was empty. Then down to another pub called 'The Bristol Trader' for more drinks. Bledd was a bit worse for wear in the Castle and had asked me to sober him up a bit before he met his girlfriend, Caz, later. I bought him a Tomato Juice which he gratefully got rid off, I got him another in the Bristol Trader but by this time he'd forgotten that he'd asked me so sober him up and told me to fuck off as he 'Wasn't drinking that Shit'! Funny guy.

Back to Lauras to see if business had picked up, it hadn't but we had a pint anyway then left for 'Eddies' (A snooker hall but serving as a Night Club for NY) More drinks there, more people turned up too. Greggers brother Dave, his mates Charles and Simon, Brimmo and his girlfriend amongst others. More drinks (goes without saying really) then back to Lauras where we set up camp for NY. Bledds girlfriend (Caz - who is Greggers little sister of 17) turned up with two of her mates, Francesca and Bethan. Immediately Greggers (24 years old) made a b-line for Franscesca and manged to slime his way into snogging her at the chimes, Bledd had Caz and Chris was left with a bloke he'd almost had a fight with earlier or a 4 foot tall girl that I had made the mistake of talking to earlier in the evening... Not the best selection I have to admit!! Home by 12:20am as a result! What a fucking shit night! Passed out back at Greggers house.

New Years Day however was a different story...

I was angry at having another shit NYE so, after taking Bledd and Caz back down to St.Davids - Greggers and myself met up with Eirian and Paul Martin in the Farmers Arms. Had a few pints and managed to persuade Eirian to come down to H'West with us for a re-match of NYE. We ordered food in the Farmers, but as I was outside on my mobile when the food arrived, I came back to discover that Greggers has helped himself to half of my burger while the chips had been nailed by the others - Fuckers. I solved this small problem by throwing tomato sauce all over Greggers, revenge is sweet! Bowen drove us to H'West and we went back to Lauras to carry on with the drinking! Nothing in particular happened but the four of us just had a good craic this time round! Hammered again, obviously. Charles and Simon showed up again along with a chap named Bobby, don't remember much but it was definitely good fun!

I'm back home at the moment but tonight I'm heading down Swansea with my mate Andy, he's having girl trouble (don't we all) so he needs someone to go out and be blokey with - fuck, I wasn't doing anything anyways! But I'll tell you what, I've got a cracking hangover at the moment - it may be a bit of a struggle...